Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Untitled

I miss you.
Now take a moment and step back because I don't think you understand the gravity of how strong those words are.
I physically. Violently. Miss you.
Its starting to become a physical ache in my chest. Or like my right arm has been lobbed off.
I miss holding you, and being held by you.
(Let me be clear that its you I'm missing and not the act of being held itself, no matter how nice that may feel. Your arms, and your touch are the things that strike a chord in my heart.)
I miss being wrapped up with you and watching anime (even if its not really my thing.) or movies that I've forced you to sit through.
I miss you laughing at my attempts to play video games.
I miss eating at the table with you and your family and really feeling like I belong.
I miss seeing that glint in your eye when you know something I don't, and refuse to tell me, making me try and figure it out for myself.
I miss you never making it easy for me.
I miss you asking me questions and making me step back and examine what I just said.
I miss that amused exasperation that you always felt with me when I laughed too hard at a bad pun or silly joke.
I miss looking forward to seeing you on the weekends.
I miss knocking at your door and you opening it the very second after with a giant grin on your face.
I miss throwing the door open when I hear you coming up the driveway.
I miss the way you tease me.
I never intended to fall so hard. Yes, I knew I loved you very deeply but I never realized until now, how attached I have become. You have become a major part and a major influence in my life and its feels so foreign not being near you.
I'm in college now and I've messed around. But every single person I meet reminds me of how unique you are. No one thinks like you do. No one perceives things like you do. And no one knows me in exactly the way that you do.
And I miss you.
I miss everything about you.
To the point that words cannot describe it.
And it hasn't even been two months.

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